Owls and Adalind

Oh, guys and gals, we have so much useless stuff to talk about, and with pictures, too. So if you came to this blog looking for a useful post, this will not be your day. I’m sorry. In fact, I have so much useless sharing to do that I don’t even know where to start. Let’s just go in order of my pictures, shall we? (Not that you actually get a choice. That’s kind of just false hope.)

For those of you who don’t know, I’m all crafty and such. I like to take old things and make them new again. There’s really nothing that’s exempt from this, no matter how ridiculous or trivial it is. What can I say? When you’re sick, you learn to amuse yourself in the only ways possible.

Enter this summer. Picture it, you’re jovially getting out your lawn ornaments (pink flamingos not included) to put out for the summer and you come across one that, well, has seen better days. There’s nothing wrong with the ornament itself, except the sun has taken its toll on it and the once colorful little fella is now void of any life. Most people would go, “eh, whatever” and either toss it on out there or throw it away. Not me. What do I do with them? Paint them. Yes, I’m serious.


After. You can’t say this doesn’t look much happier.

I recently added a new addition to our family. The fish tank, rocks and food from my last fish were all just sitting there staring at me, as if to say, “yo, Lady, you’re wasting our time if you’re not going to get a fish to put in here. Give us a new home. Buy a new fish. Either one, just don’t be lame.” I obeyed the second suggestion. Meet Monroe. (And his so far unnamed decoration friend.)

I learned a very valuable lesson yesterday. Don’t go out with your friends upset. More importantly, don’t go to the mall when you need something while upset. I needed some non-dangly earrings since I only seem to have ones that are talented at dangling and dangling only. I really only wanted one pair, maybe two, maybe a little set of them. Nothing fancy. That’s exactly what didn’t happen.

I have a thing for owls. Totally platonic, I swear. I used to think I just loved owl trinkets and the thought of owls, but not actual owls. Then I started at the wildlife center and we got the sweetest little white owl in, and now I know I really just love owls. I had pre-decided that I wanted owl earrings. The store had them. The only problem was, the store had three pairs of them, all in different sets with five other pairs of earrings, and I wanted them all. What’s a girl who is thinking irrationally to do? Buy all three sets for the owl earrings. Yeah, guys, that happened. But it was so worth it, don’t you think?

I’m probably one of the most cautiously ridiculous people when it comes to falling in love. But, guys, I’ve met the love of my life. Nothing is cuter. The only problem? Her name is Adalind…and she’s a baby duckling. Yeah, so is my life. But look at how cute she is. How can you not fall totally, completely in love with her? Impossible.

Last but not least, you all know how I like to complain about Craigslist. A few weeks back I made a joke that I blamed everyone named Craig for Craigslist. I’ve learned a lesson from it. Saying that ensures that you’ll meet someone named Craig. It also ensures that they’ll be nice and you won’t be able to blame them for Craigslist, which is actually very aggravating when you hate Craiglist. Damn it, Craig(slist)!

Karma Poop

I know it probably seems as if I’ve abandoned telling you all fun stories, or that my life abandoned throwing them at me. The truth is, I’ve still got them. In fact, I’ve got more than ever. The only problem? They involve other people, and I have a rule to never add stories about other people unless I ask them first. I haven’t asked anyone if I can blog about them. I was trying to save that amount of dork for later.

There are two stories that I can tell you by leaving relatively anyone out of it and without saying anything personal. Both of these stories happened while visiting some friends at a local college. The college is right in the middle of a very small town, so you have a ton of college kids, college life, and regular houses containing college kids mixed in with everyday Joe’s. There’s no way this could go right.

The first story, however, had nothing to do with the college kids and everything to do with an older gentleman. My friends and I were walking to their place, minding our own business, when I happened to look up and see said gentleman pushing his lawn mower down the sidewalk. Then I realized the lawn mower was on. He didn’t make any haste to move off of the sidewalk. Instead, he just continued to mow the sidewalk for upwards of two minutes. We all saw it. There were four witnesses. We were all laughing too hard to take pictures. Sorry, everyone.

A little while later, while we were standing outside and being ever so helpful while waiting for one friend to move his stuff out of his apartment and not helping whatsoever, a bird flew along and pooped right smack dab on the middle of one of the guy’s shirts. Karma, guys. It does exist. Help someone move or you’ll get pooped on.

Lesson learned.

Pretty, Girly Things

Some says blondes have more fun. Those people have obviously never been a redhead. I always said I was born a redhead, but someone forgot to tell my hair. The more bright red my hair is, the more I feel like myself. Right now, my hair looks like this.

This works for me, because I love Emma Stone. She’s completely cute and fun and classic and I’m honored my hair color turned out like hers.

This post isn’t about my hair, though. This post is about things I love that I want to share with all of you. You know, girl talk. So if you’re a guy, I’m not trying to kick you off my blog or anything, but you might be disgusted if you stay. You can’t say I didn’t warn you.

I know this is awkward, because normally my blog does one of two things. One: It uses snarkasm to make fun of the ridiculousness that are people, especially the ones on Craigslist. Two: It still uses snarkasm to tell the tales of my life, which throws the most innately unusual situations at me because it thinks it’s hilarious. I agree, so I write about it. Ever so occasionally, so much so that we won’t count it in number form, I do tell heart stories, the sentimental stories of life and love and survival. This post falls under none of those categories. In fact, in my past eight years of blogging, I don’t think I’ve really done anything like this. It’s abnormal for me. In fact, I’m a little abnormal right now, but in the good way. I’m normally snarky and cynical, but I’ll just let my friend Sandye sum up for you how I’ve been acting lately.

“Ok I don’t know how to take the new Amy. You’re all girly and I’m like wtf do I do with this? LOL!”

Look, I make a horrible girl. I might make a really good, sassy black girl, but as far as being girly and cute and soft, that’s just not me. Things can happen to give you hope. People can change. It’s a good thing. So let’s take this change and run with it. I won’t even tell you the story of the woman on Craigslist who wants what I’m selling but can’t afford it, so she keeps telling me the story of her life hoping that I will basically give her what I’m selling. Nope, not even going to go there. Instead, I give you the girly guilty pleasures that I love and that you all should check out. You know, if you want to. I’m not getting pushy with you or anything.

Red Hair – This is a no-brainer if you’ve been reading this post. However, if you’ve ever dyed your hair red, you know how difficult it is to get it bright red, especially if you have dark hair. I want to make a disclaimer stating that I have absolutely no affiliation or contract with Garnier. I’m just giving you all a tip. Garnier Nutrisse recently came out with a brand of hair dyes called Ultra-Color. They work specifically on black and dark brown hair to give you a vibrant color, and I can vouch that the red works. I used this shade specifically and went from almost black hair to Emma Stone hair in one hair color.

Hart of Dixie – I thought for sure this show was getting the ax, and I was quite honestly disappointed in this. Out of all of the shows that came out this year, this was one of two that I actually kept with all season. It’s cute, it’s girly, it’s Southern…you can see where this is going. But it didn’t get cancelled, because apparently the viewership was high enough online to keep it. Yay!

If you don’t know about the show, it’s like the new Gilmore Girls of the south. If you’re a guy and you’ve continued to read this blog despite the warning, I know you’re groaning now. I can’t help you out there now, Sir. Essentially, the show is about a young doctor, played by Rachel Bilson, who, after being refused a┬ácardiothoracic fellowship because of her astute personality that causes her to form a personal disconnect with her patients, and being dumped by her long time boyfriend, moves from New York City to a small town in Alabama to work as a general practitioner for a year in order to find a way to bond with her patients. After arriving there, she ends up finding out dark family secrets that throw her life into a frenzy. Meanwhile, she has to learn to adjust to small town after coming straight out of New York. It’s cute, it’s funny, it’s mostly clean, and it’s honest. A lot of people don’t care for Rachel Bilson in the part, but I say phooey on them. I think she’s playing it exactly how she’s supposed to be playing it. So check it out. You might also get a case of the serious cutes. The serious cutes are contagious.

In other things I love about Hart of Dixie comes Lemon Breeland’s (Jaime King) accent. There’s two accents I do when I’m goofing off, and that’s the classic, overdone Southern Belle accent and then The Lemon Breeland. The Lemon Breeland never gets old. Maybe for the people who have to listen to me do it, but not for me. It’s fun to do.

Grimm – Okay, so this one admittedly isn’t girly, but it’s fun to watch. When it first started, I was skeptical. Grimms’ Fairy Tales are well loved. Okay, so the bastardized Disney versions of the fairy tales are well loved. I was ready for the real thing. I think the writers did an excellent job of taking a bunch of dark fairy tales from 1812 and modernizing them into a show with a cohesive storyline that runs through all of the episodes. Plus, it’s completely funny. A few episodes in, I was hooked. This and Hart of Dixie are the only shows that I stuck with this year, and I’m so glad both are getting second seasons.

In related things I love comes Monroe. Oh, dear gosh, Monroe. Without Monroe, there wouldn’t be a lot of funny in this show. To be honest, the consensus seems to be that the show wouldn’t have lasted without him. When I first saw him on the show, I recognized him as “that guy.” I just didn’t know who “that guy” was or where he came from, because he was a character actor. He typically played dark, mentally disturbed parts, as opposed to the hysterical Monroe. After watching him in Grimm, it’s clear to see this guy is extremely talented, and it’s about time he became a regular in a television show.

Ellie Goulding – I’m obsessed with her right now. Obsessed. This is far from the music I usually listen to, so I can’t explain why, but I’m just completely taken and all-consumed with her music. Her whole album is an honest take on falling in love, and it’s a raw take. Typically I would make all kinds of childish sounds about this, but for some reason I’m captivated and enamored with it. I can’t stop listening to her. Check out Starry Eyed, The Writer and Guns and Horses for those cute little songs about falling in love. If you’re really angry and not down for falling for anything, check out her title track Lights.

The Original Version of Skyscraper – Most of you know this hit song as sung by Demi Lovato. What most people don’t realize is that it was written and originally recorded by Estonian artist Kerli Koiv before she ultimately turned it over to Demi for her own album. I love Demi and her version of the song. I think it’s phenomenal. But there’s something to be said for the original version. As much as Demi was able to identify with the song and feel the lyrics, this woman wrote this song and that’s about attached as you can get to a song. Add in her beautiful Estonian accent and it brings a whole new life to the song.

Little White Lace Dresses – This is the summer alternative for the little black dress, and a must have for all the simple girls out there. The make you look pretty and classy without much effort, and even Taylor Swift and Reese Witherspoon approve.

A Cute Pair of Cowboy Boots – I know this look isn’t for everyone. I grew up in cowboy boots, back when they weren’t popular and I was riding horses. These are particularly on-trend these days and more comfortable than I remember. They’re cute to pair with a little dress, say, a white lace one, or just a pair of jeans for a casual, not-trying-too-hard look. P.S. – The cowboy boots in the picture are way cuter in person.

Selena Gomez Perfume – Let me just start by saying that I’m not a perfume person. However, I’m the nerdy twenty-six year old teenager who just had to go and vote on Selena’s new perfume in a whirlwind of boredom one night. In doing so, I got a free sample of her perfume when it came out. Naturally, the scents I voted for didn’t win, so I wasn’t sure how it was going to smell. The only real way to tell how something smells is to put it on, because each perfume mixes with your specific body chemistry differently. The raspberry scent that I wanted to see in the perfume the least was the one that ended up balancing it out the most. The raspberry is the one scent that jumps out and announces itself over all the other ones, and keeps it light and from becoming one of those musky smelling perfumes that young people really don’t like at all. It’s also a romantically mature perfume, and the longer you leave it on, the more you can envision yourself out on an alluring date in it. Then again, what do I know about romance? I wore it last night and can honestly say that I would have asked myself out with that perfume on, which is saying something since I’m not my type.

The only downside to this perfume is that it’s only sold at Macy’s and retails for $55 for 3.4 ounces. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to spend that much money on perfume, nor would I ever use that much before it went bad. If they start making it in smaller bottles, I’m all over it like a duck on a Junebug.

Katy Perry Purr Perfume – Before I proceed, maybe I should just explain the joke in the name of the perfume. Katy Perry has a cat named Kitty Purry, hence the perfume. I’m so disappointed that I even know that.

I didn’t know what to expect from this scent, especially seeing that I loved Selena’s so much, but seeing as it runs around $29 for one ounce, this sounded better to me. I know in the long run it’s a bit more pricey, but at the same time, I can use an ounce before it expires and won’t be wasting it.

This was one of those perfumes that I had heard smelled natural and fruity, as opposed to musky and, well, perfume like. I’ll be the first one to admit that it doesn’t smell too tasty in the bottle, and when you first spritz it on, it has a similar effect. But after leaving it on for about ten minutes I became completely obsessed with it. It truly blossoms into a light, fun, summery scent. Though not as romantic as Selena’s perfume, it’s perfect for a casual date (What do I know about dating?) and even a night in with someone special. It also works for just hanging out with friends or a quiet evening in watching movies with your dog, because yes, my dog LOVES this perfume. She keeps running over to me to smell my wrists, which isn’t usual behavior for her, and is quite ironic considering the perfume’s name. This perfume can wear many hats, but also doesn’t overwhelm you after it has been on for a little while. It’s one of those scents that could be picked up by the wind and believed to be a local flower to those who haven’t walked up and sniffed you. And honestly, if they have, that would be weird. Yes, it’s a bit youthful, but every woman needs to know that she doesn’t have to take herself too seriously, so I think it’s a plus. If that’s not enough to make you love the perfume, there’s always the bottle.


Oh, guys. Craigslist is never a good idea. One thing I can’t do is stupid, because you can’t fix stupid. On the other hand, I have a new name for Craigslist. Stupidlist.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life it’s that I’m not fond of horse people. I was one, and no, I couldn’t stand myself. It’s not all horse people – there are some amazing horse people out there – but Craiglist seems to live up to that stereotype.

I have a pair of horse clippers on Craigslist. Today I got an email that said “Interested.” That’s it. That’s all it said. Maybe I’m jumping the gun when I assume that anyone that emails me is interested. Maybe people sit there and send you emails just to say, “Hey, this item is not something I’m interested in. Good luck selling it.” I’ve been wrong before. The issue is, how do you respond to that? I’d like to not respond and assume the person is a troll, but by the time I do that, they’ll end up not being a troll, just stupid. So I asked them if they had any questions about said clippers or if they wanted to arrange a day to meet. But I swear, if the next email says, “Still interested,” we’re going to have a problem.

Why is it so hard for people to communicate?

Who is Craig and where can I find him to slap him?

Craigslist, Man – Part 2

Oh, you guys. I have an update from the earlier Craigslist debacle.

The same person who wants my vanity, has offered me well under market value and wanted me to call them after I said I could not just sell that piece separately, will not let it go. He continues to email me regarding the piece. Now he’s willing to give me $300, which is what I’d ask for it separately, but I have still explained to him more than once that I have to sell one other piece of furniture with that piece, because if I don’t I won’t have room for the piece of furniture I want, and that will leave me with nowhere to put what was inside of the piece he wants. Now he’s emailing me asking me to pass his information on to whomever buys my set. I just don’t know what planet people come from. If someone buys the entire set, they’re going to want that piece. I’m not going to rape them with this guy’s information. As I told him, if someone buys the furniture and doesn’t want that piece I will let him know first. If he doesn’t let this go, I’m going to have to fall in love with the block button all over again.

Craigslist, Man.

Craigslist selling is hard. Mostly because people are crazy. I’m not saying I’m not a little crazy, too, but I will certainly be crazier when this is said and done.

I figured selling my furniture would be a chore. I thought certain people might want certain pieces of furniture. I decided if it took selling the pieces separately to sell the set, I would. The problem is, everyone wants the exact same piece. No one wants any of the other pieces. The other problem is, if I just sell that piece, I still can’t get a new piece of furniture because I’d have to sell another piece to fit the furniture I want in my room. No one wants to take the other piece too. I’d also have to find out what to do with the stuff in that one piece until someone does come along and buy the other piece, and even then there’s no guarantee. So essentially I might be better to keep the set than sell that piece.

If it helps, I even have one person arguing with me over that piece. I don’t think they understand I do not have to sell it to them, especially when the ad states I would prefer to sell as a set, and selling pieces separately would have to be a choice I’d have to make depending on the piece. They’re also offering me $250 without seeing it. The piece is worth $500 new and was appraised for $400 used. How nice of them. They’re trying to bully me by saying they’ll buy it in a store if I don’t sell it to them immediately. The furniture went out of production in early 2010. I do my homework. Now he wants me to call him. I’m not going to call and be bullied on the phone. Not cool, people.

As for the clipper lady, she didn’t get back to me. Oh well, you win some, you lose some.

Any thoughts or suggestions on how to better sell items on Craigslist or any other site?

A Guilty Half a Fruit Loop

Oh, y’all. *Shakes head*

I promised myself a long time ago that I would never, ever again post anything on Craigslist unless I was ready to commit suicide for being so stupid that I couldn’t live with myself anymore, or become the kind of person that finds people and slaps them with sticks shaped like baseball bats but doesn’t seriously maim them. I’m more of the get-the-point-across without serious injuries kind of girl. Since I’m not ready to die and I really don’t wish to hurt anyone, then the only conclusion I can come to for my actions is that I’ve just gotten dumb all on my own.

In my very (minimal) defense, there’s a few things I need to sell. My bedroom furniture is one, a pair of mint condition show chaps is another, and a set of horse clippers that were barely ever used is the third. Not wanting to pay to put an ad in the paper and having zero luck on other sites before, I went back to Craigslist. I hate myself for it already.

Look, I’m not saying everyone on Craigslist has a half of a brain cell or a temper. I have legitimately met some very wonderful people on there who have bought stuff off of me after reading the ad correctly and showing up when they said they would. That’s normally not the case, though. I think you have to be half a Fruit Loop to even post on there sometimes, so I guess we all know what I am. Guilty. A guilty half a Fruit Loop, to be exact.

I have had the horse clippers online for less than thirty-six hours, and I’m already considering sending myself to the mental institution just for posting them. There’s got to be something wrong with me for doing this, right? These emails aren’t as bad as they could be, I realize, but since they’ve only been up for not even thirty-six hours, it’s only bound to get worse. And, I don’t know about you, but I can usually tell by the e-mail exactly how the exchange is going to go down in full, though sometimes I’m surprised, so I write back anyway. I don’t know if it’s because I’m psychic, or if that’s normal for having dealt on Craigslist before, but “ay, caramba!,” says the whitest girl in America.

My ads are typically quite descriptive. I try to cover every single stupid question I think that I could possibly get, because on Craigslist, there’s a lot of stupid questions. Sometimes I do it to the point that my ad almost border lines insulting. But yet, I still get asked a stupid question. For instance, one time we had someone come out to look at something. Though both the ad and my emails to them stated that they had to pay in cash, they tried to hand me a check. They didn’t get the item. If you can’t even read an ad or an email, I don’t trust your check to not bounce, especially if you knew the price and told me you understood and would bring cash, but then don’t.

In my ad for the clippers, I stated that they had only been used a few times. The very first email I got was from a guy asking me if they had only been used a few times. Sir, this is generally a stupid question to ask. I wouldn’t have put it if it wasn’t the truth, which I realize isn’t always the case. Some people lie. But if those people are going to lie in their ad to get something to sell, they’re not going to suddenly change their mind and tell you the truth in an email. And, for the record, I did not lie. I suddenly got ill and was unable to ride my horses any longer, so the new pair of clippers had only gotten used a handful of times prior to that happening, and I haven’t been able to ride since. I never heard from this fine gentleman again.

In my ad, I also posted pictures of everything included with the clippers, as well as stated what all came with the clippers AND said that ONLY what is in the picture and what I put in the ad came with the clippers. Nothing else. I thought I was pretty clear, but evidently not. I received an email from a lady asking me if a bottle of lubricant and extra attachments came with the clippers. My initial thought is to face palm, but usually I just end up getting angry at stupid, because you can’t fix stupid, and then face palm. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt on this question, but I just couldn’t.

I answered her back and told her that the clippers had been used, therefore, I had used some of the lubricant. I still might have some left, but I wasn’t sure that even if I did if it was still any good, but if I did and it was, then she was welcome to it. I then told her that I had not bought the set with all the extras. But from her email, I can already see this going wrong.

She had asked me if the set comes with lubricant and all the extra attachments that come in the box. They’re only in the box if you buy the sets with all the extras. Not all of the sets come with them, and even though I told her that mine did not, I have a feeling by the wording in her email that she’s going to argue with me on it, or argue and then try to take the price down to basically nothing because she knows not all sets do and is hoping that I don’t and genuinely think I lost the extras. The bottom line is, I am selling a $120 set of clippers, along with a $20 extra set of blades for $60. For that price, she could spend the $15 on the set of extras they sell separately and still be far below retail price.

I’ll keep you posted on how this goes, as well as how selling the other two things turns out. Just consider this blog a place for Craigslist stories for awhile, because I’m going to have them, especially with the furniture. I tried to sell the furniture once before, and out of over fifty interested, legitimate emails, no one ever actually showed up to see the furniture. Now I’m at the point where I need to get rid of it, so we’ll see how this goes.

If you never hear from me again, I changed my mind on that suicide.

Proof That Being Innappropriate Isn’t Just For the Living

Hello my fine, non feathered friends. Unless there’s a bird reading this. In that case, I’m sorry for stereotyping my readers and being a jerk.

I am finally getting back around to being able to type, and be online, and do things that need to be done. I’m officially and genuinely shocked at the amount of emails and internet related things I’ve had to do, and my arm still isn’t sure how it feels about doing anything on the computer in long stints. It seems okay being minimally useful, though, so I’m going with it. I have so many fun little stories to tell you all, but I’ll start with the most recent one.

For those of you who are new to this blog and don’t know me, I’m a psychic medium. In doing this, I also work with the Historical Society, who do their research and pull records on a site to verify what I’ve said while working with them on a case. After nearly a year, they still continue to work with me, and I’m honored. I’ve never said I wasn’t crazy, but if I am, I have proof that I’m crazy, but right about what I pick up. It’s a very complex issue. I never ask anyone to believe me and some people will think I’m at least half a fruit loop, but I believe everyone is entitled to and should have their own beliefs and opinions. I don’t blame you stop reading now. For those who do believe, thank you for continuing to read this. I promise this is funny.

Part of being a psychic medium is understanding that spirits will openly waltz in and out of all rooms of my home, my life, and anything I’m doing (This does not exclude showering.) to get my attention. Some I can cross over immediately, some take awhile longer, and others are essentially what are known as spirit guides. They guide me and help me along with cases, giving me information when the offending spirit I am working a case around won’t help me or give me information for a variety of reasons, including that they don’t wish to cross over or leave a space.

That being said, there is a particular spirit that I’ve had for just over a year. She’s called Sarah. Sarah is a bit different from the other spirits I’ve had, and she needs a special, specific kind of help, therefore, though I’ve been actively working her case to help her this entire time, it’s taking awhile longer than any other spirit I’ve had. Sarah is loud, outspoken, says exactly what she thinks (Because, as she’ll tell you, she’s dead and doesn’t have any reason to monitor herself.), and refuses to apologize for it. Because of the specifics of the situation and what helping her entails, it’s been a bit difficult to get my mom to understand what is going on. She has always believed me before, but she couldn’t wrap her mind around Sarah. Yesterday, Sarah decided she wasn’t having any of that at all anymore.

In order to understand this story, you have to understand that my mom is one of those women who is set in her ways, always right, or just generally doesn’t care. She’s pretty much going to do whatever she’s going to do, etiquette and appropriateness be damned. I had mentioned to my mom earlier in the day that Sarah was with us for this particular excursion, she asked me some questions, and seemed to be coming around to Sarah, which was fully unexpected, but I rolled with it. After lunch I had gotten up to use the restroom and came back to find my mom sitting alone at the table with a funny look on her face. I knew something was up, but I decided to sit back down at the table and let it play out.

Not long after I sat down my mom asked me if she should leave five or six dollars as a tip. She never asks me this. She just decides and that’s that. But since she was asking, I told her she should definitely leave at least six for the tipping rate to be appropriate to the price of our meal. She nodded and reached for her purse, still with a funny look on her face. After a few minutes passed, she proceeded to tell me what it was that had her looking so bewildered.

While I was in the restroom, she was deciding on what she wanted to leave for a tip. It was just the two of us, so she was alone at the table and silent. She reached for her purse, deciding she was going to leave a five dollar tip, and as I mentioned before, my mom pretty much does what she wants, appropriate or not. Just as she went to pull out the five dollar bill, she heard a young girl say, “You cheap bitch!” Her first thought was that it was me, but I wasn’t at the table. Her second was that it was someone in a surrounding table, but she was contemplating a tip silently. No one else knew what she was doing. And that’s when it hit her.

She looked me straight in the face and said, “Sarah called me a cheap bitch.”

She doesn’t give me a hard time about Sarah anymore or question her. And this is so right on par with Sarah’s behavior that I didn’t even question it. She has no off button. I’ve been called many a things by Sarah when I’ve not done what she wanted me to do immediately, which includes but is not limited to buying something at the store in the style she likes since she apparently “lives here too” and not paying attention to her because I need to sleep and she likes to talk twenty four seven. Ghosts don’t sleep. But never in my life did I think she’d call my mom a cheap bitch.

My mom left a six dollar tip.